Setting Priorities

The rich young ruler came to Jesus and he said he followed all the commandments from his youth up.  He was conscientious of doing the right thing, but when Jesus said that he lacked one thing and to go and sell everything, he could not do it.  It’s because money was more important.

No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money. Matthew 6:24

As a Christian, sometimes I think we do a poor job of presenting the “whole” gospel.   God turned the captivity of Job and he got twice as much.  I agree that after I came out of a divorce, I did get twice as much.  I got a man with at least three times the income, who helped raise my four children, let me work on a college degree, was not a control freak,  and I had a relationship that was definitely a “double anointing.”  But if I was going to look at that now being a widow would that mean I would marry someone who makes $150,000?

A CEO with an airplane emailed through an online website and my friend at work said, “Mary would you really want to be married to a CEO, when would you get to see him?”  I don’t doubt that God can give me a man who makes $150K, but I’ve sat down with a couple of  Christian men, one who told me that they made $100K last year, working a bunch of overtime at Rolls-Royce, and he looked so burnt out, his eyes looked “tired.”  Same look my husband had in his eyes –he looked like a worn out soul.  I get concerned and pray for a person whenever I see that worn out look in their eyes.  I don’t know if that means there time is going to be short on the earth. I’ve seen it in both women and men.   Our eyes should be bright (sort of bright eye and bushy tailed) --- The eyes are the windows of the soul.

God wants us to prosper even as our soul prospers.

Dear friend, I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you, even as your soul is getting along well.  3 John 1:2

A man rich towards men is not necessary rich towards God.

So is he that lays up treasure for himself, and is not rich toward God. Luke 12:21

My husband worked many late hours and sometimes I felt like he was a stranger.  Friday night was our date night to “get to know each other again.”  He also worked many Saturdays.  When we would go on vacation, he would be talking sometimes to his company before he got on the plane, when he got off, and they even called him when we were on a 5-day trip to Hawaii.  To make that type of income was a lot of hours at the office.

So it comes down to what is more important – what is getting double – money or time?  After raising six children between us and having a man who worked a lot, having a father who worked a lot and seeing my dad stressed out all the time, I’ll take double the time.  Quality time is more important to me than money.

One of the hidden motives the Lord dealt with me about going to mega churches was I was wanting to be on the same income level with people, and then God flat out told me, “I’ve not called you to a rich man’s church.”  He showed me that my ministry has always been inner city.   I like big churches and I like small churches, it’s just what the Lord showed me where he wants me to be.  

I have gotten disappointed on several occasions when I brought friends to single ministries that people would not even introduce themselves to my new friends.  It gets very clicky in some groups and it’s hard to bring a new person.

My daughter was telling me recently how she went to a Bible study and everyone was friendly and introduced themselves and she said that even though she did not know anyone, it was like she was “home.”   It was the same experience when my husband and I first came to our church on the Westside, it’s what won us to want to be there.   We were the only blended family in that church, so we felt alone many times and had to get help from outside sources in getting through blended family issues, but the friendliness of the church won our hearts.

I don’t see anywhere in the Bible where we are supposed to run off people in fact it says, “He that wins souls/friends is wise.”   That is the opportunity to reach out to people to love them.  For some reason, the body of Christ thinks they have to get their iron out, and straighten everybody out.  I’ve experienced that too.  I feel like I’m doing damage control inventory at times.

The fruit of the righteous is a tree of life, and the one who wins people is wise. Proverbs 11:30

I want favor with whom God wants me to have favor with.  I want the promotion that comes from God, not a man, or my rewarding myself.

For promotion cometh neither from the east, nor from the west, nor from the south. But God is the judge: he putteth down one, and setteth up another. Psalm 75:6-6

I had this job at Methodist Hospital and I remember I had a thought how “secure” the health field was.  Right after that thought, I had a dream that my manager and my position were going to be cut.  It was cut about one month later.  They had one day they called “Black Tuesday” where they let go of ten facilities managers.  So much for the “secure” environment.  Most people I talk to at Methodist had worked there over 20 years.  I decided not to be reassigned since there was no manager I “clicked” with. 

I then went to a manufacturing company and that company had been going for 25 years, but when I started as the President and General Manager’s assistant and HR coordinator, I did not know they were in financial trouble and the stockholders voted to sell the company.  They had me walking people out with a box of Kleenex to their car they let go.  I found my first job working at at a university, but it was not what I wanted.  I went through a series of jobs because I was not really “settled” on what I wanted.  Fortunately for me while I was learning this valuable lesson on how God gives me the ability to find the right job, I could fall back on my husband’s income.  

But remember the Lord your God, for it is he who gives you the ability to produce wealth, and so confirms his covenant, which he swore to your ancestors, as it is today. Duet. 8:18

God gives us power (ability) to get wealth or choose a job, God gives us power (ability) to choose a mate, and God gives us power to choose a church.   I got one job offer at the university, but I did not have a peace about that job.  It was a very strange interview where the manager talked about himself the whole time and never asked me any questions.  I got a call about a week later from the Chancellor of Ivy Tech Community College offering me $5K more than I was making.  I knew that was the job where the Lord wanted me to work.

It was not a cake walk being divorced in finding a great Christian companion I enjoyed being with.   Some men are rather “uptight” and no fun to be with day in and day out.  If they do poorly on their job, then they take out their job problems on me. There was this same insanity I went through in being divorced only it has been worse in being widowed, because rather than gradually coming off a relationship or having love die in someone’s heart first, this was a cold turkey of a good relationship. 

I find that God does a good job of curing me of my problems as far as before I became a Christian, I got fed up with my friends, alcohol and drugs, well I’ve gotten fed up with men.  Once you sit down with 30 men and it’s all about sex, it cures one of being shallow.  So I came to the conclusion, “Yes God, a godly man or godliness is more important to me than sex.”  When I said that to God, it was like a light bulb went off inside me.  

But godliness with contentment is great gain. 1 Tim. 6:6

My batting average was 2/3 as far as I had a man who I enjoyed being with physically and mentally as a companion,  but he was not into God as much as I was into the Lord.  If I am going to get double, then it would be all three.  But that will only come with a man who has set his priorities right.