What Is Marriage Part 1: The Sun, Moon and Stars

We get an idea of the marriage relationship from Joseph’s dream when he talks about how his father (the sun), his mother (the moon) and his brothers (the stars) bowed down to him.  It was a dream that Joseph shared with his brothers which was not a good idea.  They already had jealousy issues with their dad giving him a coat of many colors.  One of the Old Testament laws was not to wear cloth with different materials, but that was after Moses.  His brothers were already annoyed at their baby brother on the first dream, and he really pushed them over the edge with the thought of bowing down to him.

Then he had another dream, and he told it to his brothers. "Listen," he said, "I had another dream, and this time the sun and moon and eleven stars were bowing down to me." Genesis 37:9

Paul said that the woman is the “glory” of the man – the man is the sun.  Biblical marriage represents Jesus (sun) to the church (wife).  We are to let his light shine through us. Matthew 5:14-16.  Our offspring of a relationship, we hope to produce a godly seed.  We can look at the woman and if she is happy, she will shine the brilliance of her husband.  Couples sort of look like each other.  This is similar to how when we shine the light of Christ to the world we produce godly (spiritual offspring). 

A man ought not to cover his head, since he is the image and glory of God; but woman is the glory of man. 1 Cor. 11:7

Has not the one God made you? You belong to him in body and spirit. And what does the one God seek? Godly offspring. So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful to the wife of your youth. Malachi 2:15

Children shine from their parents as the stars and it’s nice when my daughters are servants.  We model our parents relationship good or bad.  Usually, we can look at the father and get an idea of how the father is going to treat his wife, by how his father treated his mother.  This is unless a man makes a conscious effort to make a change in his own life.  It says we are to imitate our heavenly Father model him. 

Imitate God, since you are the children he loves.  Ephesians 5:1

We model what our parents taught us.  It’s like an replication of an airplane or car model that we built as a child, only our parents are our model/example.  Paul said “follow me as I follow Christ.”  1 Cor. 11:1.  

The example to husbands is that they lay down their life for their wife like Christ laid down his life.  I don’t see any time that Jesus beat up his disciples, criticized or called them bad names or yelled out “Submit to me woman (or disciples).”

No, Jesus washed his disciples feet as their leader.  

I smile when I think of the movie “Amelia” where Amelia Earhart before she took her wedding vows told the minister she would not say the words, “Obey my husband.”  She told him to take it out of the wedding ceremony.   The minister looked at her baffled, but her future husband told him to take it out too during the ceremony.  

I like the example of Jesus who washed all his disciples feet.  Another example is Jesus cooked breakfast for his disciples. John 21:1-14.   It’s a man with a servant heart.  I’ll take a foot massage.

Children can reflect the attitudes of their parents as far as if the parents have prejudice, the children may exhibit behavior of being prejudice, parents who criticize others, pass on their critical spirit to their children, if the parents had anger problems, the children may have anger problems.  If our parents were unaffectionate then we have the tendency to be a cold person.  Adam and Eve passed on their sin nature to their children.  

Jacob contributed to the competition/jealousy issue going on between Rachel and Leah and that was passed down to the children.  We can’t really tell if that same thing happened with Cain and Abel and far as Adam and Eve maybe showing favoritism, but Cain had a problem with sibling rivalry too.   We see that reflected after Cain killed Abel there was no remorse when he said, “Am I my brother’s keeper?” 

Jesus warned that we are not to be like the Gentiles in being a “lord” over each other.   Control issues seems to be very prevalent in our society and a lack of propriety and virtue.  Turn on an episode of Cops and watch a domestic violence case if you don’t believe there are control issues, or go to a shelter for women and children.  What is sad that when Christian men’s minds are not renewed to the word of God (changed) by the word of God than they think the abusive behavior of their father is correct.

Jesus called them together and said, "You know that those who are regarded as rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. Mark 10:42

My husband had some arrogance issues of his father at times.  At Christmas, my father-in-law did not pay attention to my daughter and grandson were watching a movie, but walked in and turned the television channel to sports.   Some of that is old school where my husband’s father never lifted a finger to help his wife around the kitchen, but always expected to be served.  My guess his father was like that too. 

In Christ the walls of separation and segregation were broken down between Gentiles and Jews and between male and female and it says we are to honor one another and submit to one another.  We are all one in Christ Jesus.  Paul was dealing with uneducated women in his time yelling across the room at their spouse since men and women sat separately.   There were women elders and Lydia was a successful merchant that opened her home to Paul’s ministry.

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Ephesians 5:21

Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another; Romans 12:10

"A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. John 13:34

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, Philip 2:3

As far as leadership roles, I believe it’s good to defer a final decision to a husband in marriage, and I prefer a pastor or Bible study leader who is in a good marriage to be my counselor and guide.  It could be a woman if she has a stronger anointing and her husband has more of an administration gift like Joyce Meyer’s husband.  

We are in a war situation.  Does it make a difference who is holding the gun to defend our territory?  Does it make a difference if a woman police officer comes to my door when I call 911?  Does it make a difference who is holding their Bible or sharing God’s word?  Are we so focused on sex that we can only receive from a man’s body? 

There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.  Galatians 3:28. 

I believe it’s better for men to minister to men and women to women as the Bible instructs to avoid situations of the temptation to sin and submit to the lust of the flesh. 

Jesus used women to be the first to witness his resurrection, he used a woman with five husbands and living with a man to witness to a whole town.  We have the example of the Judge Deborah where God used a woman to go with him to battle and when Barak was not willing to go by himself, she told him that the enemy would be delivered into a woman’s hand.  Sisera fled the battle site seeking refuge in the tent of a woman named Jael. In the Biblical account, Jael killed the enemy leader, Sisera.  A woman gave the king milk to make him tired, and then drove a nail through his skull when he fell asleep.  Sounds like the woman had a lot of gumption. 

We have Judge Judy…LOL

While men argue what woman should do or not do, I’ll get my armor bearer (which is another musician) and go look for a place to share music.  Jonathon did not wait around for Saul to wake up, but went and killed a hill of Philistines with his sword.  The church is still way behind when it comes to the rest of the world.  In Korea, women are more actively involved in ministry with their husband in home fellowships, but I find many Christian men threatened by women ministers. Our American society still has a long way to go as far as we accept first a Catholic president and then a black president (some) but I wonder if many white males would ever accept a woman president. 

The Bible says when we open our mouths we should speak as the oracles of God. 

If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen. 1 Peter 4:11

Personally, I never cared for management positions in the work place or in church, I like being an assistant, because I think it’s grievous to have to fire or correct people.   I’ve had managers assign me helpers at work, because there was so much work overflow, and the goal is to get the work down.  Same with college projects, my professors determined, I made a better leader in a technical writing class and then some students don’t like to write.  I’ve been on some teams where no one wants to be the leader so I volunteered.  The goal is to “get the job done.”  Do the “work of the ministry.”

But you, keep your head in all situations, endure hardship, do the work of an evangelist, discharge all the duties of your ministry.  2 Timothy 4:5