God's Builds Hope in a Hopeless World

God I need your hope!

Brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope. 1 Thess. 4:13-18

I asked the Lord about this scripture above because as a Christian when we lose a person we dearly love, especially a child or loving husband/wife, we are all going to grieve.  We are not like some non-believers that have no hope to see our loved ones in the future.  Some people believe when you are gone you cease to exist and the scriptures goes on to say that we will see our loved ones again.

 ¹⁴ For we believe that Jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that God will bring with Jesus those who have fallen asleep (died) in him.

I did not understand what the author was talking about, but I do now.  It’s because although my faith and love has been restored in God, I’ve been a person caught up in the despair of life as one without any hope in my own future on earth without my beloved.  When I attended my brother’s high school reunion I asked him if any single men were there and he said, “By this time in life everyone has made a mistake or two and found their lifetime mate.” 

It’s December 24^th in my life and everything has been picked over at the store of life.  People don’t understand that holidays feed despair.   People turn to alcohol and drugs to drown out the voices in their heads.  I constantly pray that God will take me to heaven.  It's only because of the despair I experience from loss.  God has been restoring hope in my life and I believe next is His joy.   Paul prayed that God would deliver him from his body of sin.

and provide for those who grieve in Zion--to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair. They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the LORD for the display of his splendor. Isaiah 61:3

At Christmas, my house was like a train station where people come and go, but holidays serve as a reminder of my loss.  I talked to a man who lost his father when he was 15 years old.  His mother threw all the pictures away of her husband when he died.  That seemed extreme and now her son would like to have pictures of his father.  It’s because when our husband is dead, our heart is not free.  Getting rid of a person's things, selling your house, moving, or throwing away pictures is trying to free the heart.  When I went through a divorce I put all the pictures of my ex-husband in a box because I knew my children would still want those pictures.

For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Matthew 6:21

Sometimes (like divorce) you may sever ties to inlaws and former friends because they will hold you back into staying your "husband's widow" and don't see you as an individual separate from the marriage unit.  The Bible is very clear that marriage is only on earth not in heaven.  

When the dead rise, they will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven. Mark 12:25
A woman is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to marry anyone she wishes, but he must belong to the Lord. 1 Cor. 7:29

Jesus said, "Do this in remembrance of me."  There are healthy memories that are positive of our loved ones and we don't have to feel guilty in moving forward in life just like we have communion in remembrance of Jesus.  We celebrate our husband or wife life as we celebrate communion in memory of Jesus giving his life for us on earth.

One of the things I deal with in being around singles is their great pride about being single.  I’ll be the first to admit I don’t like sleeping in bed alone, did not like having a broken ankle and cutting my finger by myself, don’t like calling Triple A or a tow company instead of my husband changing my tire, don’t like taking walks alone or going to movies, restaurants, or eating at the table alone.  I’m in an endurance race to walk in self-control/celibacy.   The longer I walk the single walk, the worse it gets.  That is the difference between being divorced than widowed.  The longer you are widowed the more you miss the person and miss the life you had.   Most people divorced get used to being single.  With being widowed, there is more and more hopelessness and despair that attacks my life.

May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you a spirit of unity among yourselves as you follow Christ Jesus, Romans 15:5

This calls for patient endurance on the part of the saints who obey God's commandments and remain faithful to Jesus.   Revelation 14:12

We also pray that you will be strengthened with all his glorious power so you will have all the endurance and patience you need. May you be filled with joy, Colossians 1:11

If my husband would have had that attitude (like some single men) that he did not need me or want me, I would have told him to go sleep on the couch.  He was a very arrogant man who was very intelligent, but he humbled himself to live with a peon like me.   In fact, he humbled himself every night.  So I’m the least of the least in the kingdom of God as far as being single.

The Bible talks about the husband/wife relationship represents Jesus to the Bride (the church).  We have to humble ourselves to admit that we can’t lead our lives without God.  It’s a daily humbling in my life that God I need your source of power.  Marriage was a daily humbling ourselves to each other that we needed each other for that person to fulfill needs in life.   

But he gives us more grace. That is why Scripture says: "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble." James 4:6 Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up. James 4:10

For whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted. Matthew 23:12

Lately, the Lord has been showing me how the Holy Spirit is my helper as my husband was my help-mate.   He is my comforter.  I get overwhelmed at times with life, but I have a source of power within and that is the Holy Spirit.   My husband was the helper who took his share of the yoke and burden in marriage.

JOHN 14:15-17:  "If you love me you will obey what I command.  And I will ask the Father and He will give you another Comforter to be with you forever - the Spirit of Truth.  The world cannot accept him because it neither sees him nor knows him.  But you know him for he lives with you and will be in you."

JOHN 14:25, 26:  "All this I have spoken while still with you.  But the Comforter, the Holy Spirit whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things and will remind you of everything I have said to you."

JOHN 15:26:  "When the Comforter comes, whom I will send to you from the Father, the Spirit of truth who goes out from the Father, he will testify about me."

I believe that praise and worship is part of humbling ourselves before God like the intimate relationship of a husband and wife in being one flesh.  Studying God’s word reminds me of communication with a spouse as far as getting to know a person.  We get to know God through his word. 

There was no hope in Israel.  Saul was too scared to face Goliath, none of the Israelites would face a 9-foot giant.  It had been forty days that Goliath constantly tormented the Israelites with his railings.  Satan constantly torments me with despair.  

A champion named Goliath, who was from Gath, came out of the Philistine camp. He was over nine feet tall. 1 Samuel 17:4

On hearing the Philistine's words, Saul and all the Israelites were dismayed and terrified. 1 Samuel 17:11

For forty days the Philistine came forward every morning and evening and took his stand. 1 Samuel 17:16

A nobody – a shepherd boy faced Goliath.  He did not face him in his own strength, he did not use Saul’s armor, but he had the armor of the Lord on.  David restored the Israelites faith and their hope of God to fight for Israel. 

David said to the Philistine, "You come against me with sword and spear and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the LORD Almighty, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied. 1 Samuel 17:45

Getting Off a Detour Road

One early morning, I woke up and the Lord spoke to my spirit that he has me on a detour road.  I did not ask for this detour or a road closed in my life.  So now I’m on a totally different road than I would have been if my husband was still living.  I certainly would not be going to single groups or ministering to widows.  I would have continued in my college classes until I finished my degree, sought a new job and ministered to the girl’s prison ministry.  Detour roads are rather shi….tty.  Pardon my French.   Not only do those detour roads often wind around but you don’t get to your destination on time and who in the heck invented the routing system anyway?  I mean what engineer designs the best route when you take an alternative route?   Not only that but you have to pay close attention to where the signs are when you take a detour and you can miss the signs and then you have to go back to find where you took a wrong turn.  You are not usually taking the most straight/direct route anymore.  I don't enjoy the scenery on a detour road, I'm just trying to figure out how to get back on a good road and pay attention to the signs of where I will get back on. If you live anywhere near Keystone Road on the northside will appreciate what it is like to not have to take a detour road.

Eventually (if you don’t get lost), you come off a detour road and maybe the road up ahead now has been paved and it may be new highway or road that was constructed.  At least in our cases it is a new highway since the former one no longer exists.  There is an entirely new road I’ve walked on several times in my life.  During this new road, I’m seeking God on my steps being ordered by God.   The Holy Spirit is our guide. 

"But when he, the Spirit of Truth comes, he will guide you into all truth.  He will not speak on his own, he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come.  He will bring glory to me by taking from what is mine and making it know to you.  All that belongs to the Father is mine.  That is why I said the Spirit will take from what is mine and make it known to you." John 16:13-15

It’s like I’m pregnant right now.  Only pregnant with a dream and a new vision.  Pregnant women have to be treated with tender loving care.  To nourish and cherish dreams and visions they have to be nourished and grown inside of us.   If a right arm offends you --- cut it off.  That is cutting off any dead branches in my life or people who bring down those dreams and visions for a new life and the new road he wants me to walk on.

People fail you.  My parents failed me.  There were many times my husband and I did not see eye to eye on things and I had to follow my heart.  We can’t trust in banking institutions or riches (many people killed themselves during the depression), not the government that has no clue how to handle world crisis, not people, not family.   Family disappoint me.  I disappoint my children.  Life is disappointment.  God builds hope in a hopeless world.

For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed and so became the father of many nations, just as it had been said to him, "So shall your offspring be." Roman 4:18  

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. 1 Cor. 13:3

"My Hope is Built on Nothing Less"

 by Edward Mote, 1797-1874

My hope is built on nothing less

Than Jesus' blood and righteousness;

I dare not trust the sweetest frame,

But wholly lean on Jesus' name.

On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;

All other ground is sinking sand.

When darkness veils His lovely face,

I rest on His unchanging grace;

In every high and stormy gale

My anchor holds within the veil.

On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;

All other ground is sinking sand.

His oath, His covenant, and blood

Support me in the whelming flood;

When every earthly prop gives way,

He then is all my Hope and Stay.

On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;

All other ground is sinking sand.

When He shall come with trumpet sound,

Oh, may I then in Him be found,

Clothed in His righteousness alone,

Faultless to stand before the throne!

On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;

All other ground is sinking sand.