Many times ministers tend to be stricter on their own children compared to the congregation’s children. As far as I was listening to this radio commentary on Moody and a minister called in and said how disappointed he was in his son. His son wanted him to perform the ceremony for him to marry a woman who had two children and she was a single mother never married.
The minister said to the other minister: “Don’t look at him as your son that you are disappointed in – look at them as any regular couple out there and this will be an in-road into your new daughter-in-law’s heart. How you treat them will determine if you are able to minister to them in the future. If you blow it by not marrying them, then you can blow an opportunity for an in-road into their hearts for a lifetime.”
The Bible says that “marriage is honorable in every way.” Hebrews 13:4
I find that many times it’s easier to mend other people’s fences. My sister’s husband was a mechanic and for some reason he fixed other people’s car, but rarely wanted to fix his own car. Same with a nurse I worked with whose husband was a psychologist and she said that she wished he followed his own relationship advice at home. My spouse was a “Mr. Fix it” but it was a lot easier for friends to get him to do things for them, compared to getting him to do things around our house. Pastors are notorious for fixing everyone’s problems, but at times they seem to “neglect” to keep their own fences mended.
I sort of got a “kick” out of this song that goes – "The only one that could ever teach me – was the son of a preacher man, the only one that could ever reach me, was the son of a preacher man."
Not all preacher's kids necessary rebel, I've seen some like Lester Sumrall's and Paul Crouch’s son that follow in their father’s footsteps, but I can offer some reasons why we hear stories like Greg Laurie who is a popular evangelist said that both of his son’s rebelled.
Sin is very enticing and when someone is raised with totally a straight and narrow focus where there is no life outside of church – where day in and day out we are spending every waking hour at church then life can become a drudgery after awhile.
That person has no outside interests – they have no hobbies they have no other outlet, but all their focus is on going to church. I have to take “breaks” at times and get way from ministering to people. I really admire pastors because although some go on sabbatical, I can’t imagine the pressure on their lives. The Bible says they deserve “double” honor.
The elders who direct the affairs of the church well are worthy of double honor, especially those whose work is preaching and teaching. 1 Timothy 5:17
But, some dads don’t take the time to even go to their children’s sporting events or find interests that their child wants to do. It’s cramming a life style down their throats of what they want them to do rather than letting them find their own way.
How many of us were raised with fathers that forced their own political views and opinions on us? Both my former spouse and I were. Rather than us finding our own path, we were put on this path that our father thought we should go on. My spouse followed in his father’s footsteps in being an engineer, and my brother pretty much followed in my dad’s footsteps, but my sister and I rebelled. Same with my sister-in-law she rebelled.
The father in the Bible actually “let” his son (the prodigal) go his own way and even handed him his inheritance a head of time.
Some kids their dads were so strict they were not allowed to go to prom. My youngest daughter chose to go to Covenant Christian High School and they had an “alternative” type prom.
I have to admit when I went to my one and only prom in life, it did not go very well. I was 16 years old a sophomore who went with a junior and I still had my “innocence” and the guy I went out with thought since he spent all that money. he was going to get a reward. I actually broke up with him that night, because I did not have those types of feelings or maturity.
There is a scripture we can stand on as parents:
Train up a child in the way he should go, And when he is old he will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6