Making Light Bulbs

It’s hard to go to church anymore at times.  I like listening to several ministers on Christian television and it’s so edifying.  It’s because a single ministry I was involved with for three years that had many socials during the holidays and many events, the funding was cut and it flopped.  That happened to two single ministries I was attending.

One that was going for 11 years.  Now, I’m back at churches with more focus on married couples, but not very many single ministries. I question God –Lord why do I go to churches where a pastor does not care about widows or singles?  

Some single groups I've gone to seemed rather unbalanced with a bunch of women and just a few men.  The one I'm talking about was run by a full time single pastor and it was a strong ministry at one time.  Some people have told me a while back they had JRM which ran 200-300 singles here in Indy. 

I can remember when my husband and I got married we got married through a single's pastor at Chapel Rock and they had around fifty singles in attendance at that one group.  We did not meet at that ministry, but I attended there and it flopped after that pastor left.

It’s a spiritual problem and how can Jesus come back just for the married couples?  Are all these single people that are a large part of the population going to be left behind when Jesus comes?  

Rather than seeing single’s as a ministry, many churches are ran more like a business and singles are not profitable.  It’s the first ministry to go financially, and they don’t want to deal with the drama of singles who get in relationships.  I realize I’ve been “picking up” intercession of many singles and widows in Indy as far as my discouragement is also other single’s discouragement in Indianapolis here. 

Part of the ministry of an intercessor is to birth ministries.  I have a friend who had a dream that she had five babies and they instantly were sitting up and she was feeding them.  I know that was the birth of dreams in her life.

We can’t solve “spiritual” problems in a natural way.  It’s a matter to take to prayer as far as the ministry of singles and widows. 

So he said to me, "This is the word of the Lord to Zerubbabel: 'Not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,' says the Lord Almighty. Zech 4:6

Some of us are like Thomas Edison Christians.  John Townsend and Henry Cloud Christian psychologists said if you date 200 women than you are just one step closer to finding the right woman or light bulb.

If your light bulb breaks, you run out and replace a light bulb.  I found that was easy to do with a divorce.  I had some “resistance” in finding a mate, but I got outside my comfort zone at 35 years old by placing a single’s ad to meet my husband.   I remember singing that song to victory at the time by Amy Grant, “Love Will Find a Way.”  Or God will find a way after divorce. 

So when I lost my light bulb which is my spouse through death six years ago, I’ve done the same thing that worked before, I’ve been putting myself out there.  Like before first with single’s groups, Christian and secular and than trying online dating. 

At 52 years old, it’s been “quite” the challenge as far as finding a Christian man even on Christian Mingle who wants a full time relationship.  Many have just said that they want to have fun – with no intention of getting married.  It sort of reminds me of a part time job as far as no benefits.

I was looking at that scripture and I was thinking how many times men compartmentalize their life and when David said, “Although I make my bed in hell behold you are there.”  It says there is no rest in hell so I know there is no bed in hell.   

 

I believe David may have been talking about his adultery.   That like Paul said, “In him we move, live and have our being.”  God is the one who holds this whole universe together.  Like the song says, “He’s got the whole world in his hand.”

If I go up to heaven, you are there. If I make my bed in hell, you are there. Psalm 139:8

I can’t separate my spirituality from my sexuality.

I have found as a believer that many times I’m trying to solve a spiritual problem in a natural way. 

I remember when I had a rebellious 13-year old step-daughter come to live with my husband and I four months after I was married.  It was because her mother said she could not handle her.  I was not up for the challenge.  I found getting adjusted to a new husband was enough with my four children and a full time step son.  I read books, went on step-family groups and went to counseling with my husband for one year.

Let me save you $150 per session to what the “conclusion” I came out with is that with step children, I had to give unconditional love.  That is no matter what they said or did, that I loved them unconditionally.  I find that is the same when it comes to anyone on this planet that they need unconditional love.

God sent his prophets and they were stoned and killed to straighten up Israel, and God sent his son and he was beaten and killed, but in the process he sent his Holy Spirit that lives inside of us and now we have that same unconditional love that God showed at the cross.  That God died for his worst enemy.  Rather than fighting Goliath, we would even love a Goliath!  We love our enemies.

And hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. Romans 5:5

I would not want my children to die for my worst enemy.   Many times even Christian parents give conditional love that is based on us pleasing them in some way.   As long as you go to the college they want us to go to, as long  we have the same political party, as long as you have all A’s on our report card, the list goes on and on.  As long as we meet a certain set of conditions or standards than I will love you. Rather than I accept you and love you as you are.  Not based on what you do or don’t do.  Just as I am.

I have had friends that disappoint me at times by not keeping their word.  A long time ago I heard that if we don’t keep our word, we won’t believe that God keeps his word (fulfills his promises to us).  So I’ve been careful not to put myself out there and not be able to keep my word—my commitments.

I can remember if I ever told my son anything as a child and we did not go to the grocery store and buy him a toy, you would think the whole earth ended as far as breaking my promise to my son so I know how important it is to keep my word.

It tells us that God watches over his word to perform it.  Many times, I hold God’s word up to him like Corrie ten Boom did, “God your word says this.”

For the eyes of the Lord move to and fro throughout the earth that He may strongly support those whose heart is completely His. You have acted foolishly in this. Indeed, from now on you will surely have wars." 2 Chronicles 16:9

Then the Lord said to me, “You have seen well, for I am watching over my word to perform it.” Jeremiah 1:12

I’m sure when Corrie was stuck in that German concentration camp and she lost her father and her sister, it was hard to forgive the people who hurt her loved ones.  I too at times have a hard time forgiving God for allowing my parents, sister and husband to die, but someone gave me a word that really helped me.

They told me that if God sees every sparrow who dies and falls to the ground how much more does he care for us.  The Lord told me when my husband first died that he is taking care of “all” my treasures in heaven.

If God cares so much for sparrows, we know that he cares for us, no matter what bad we have gone through in life.  He sent his only son for us.

He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all--how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Romans 8:32

What is the price of two sparrows--one copper coin? But not a single sparrow can fall to the ground without your Father knowing it. Matthew 10:29