God made the animals with crazy mating rituals and I’m part of His crazy plan. Men can be plum boring like plum pudding. Jerry McGuire in reverse, “You lost me at hello.” I look for an endorphin feeling. A Campbell’s Soup man that is “Mmm good.” My husband was hot to me even with a large gut and gray hair. He kept my attention with his intelligence, mystery, and spunky personality. “Be fruitful and multiply”…some are better at multiplication. I skipped a table with twins.
I found the best mate God had for me at that moment in time through a single's ad. The cream of the crop. Lot’s wife looked back because she had no faith that God could bring her into a better land. (Without a vision the people perish Proverbs 29:18). Because He lives I can face today…sufficient are the giants and evil of today (Matthew 6:34). I’ve had a double portion in a Christian marriage (Isaiah 61:7). Don’t know if there is a triple portion? Looking for those “divine” moments in time. I’m a co-laborer with God. 2 Corinthians 6:1
People have asked me how I know the Bible. My Trigonometry professor says if you write down the formulas 16K times you will eventually “get them” in your mind. I have listened to the scriptures 16K times on CD. Psalm 119:11….I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you. I try to be obedient to hear God's voice in small ways to help others. Not being a hearer only and self-deceived. (Mathew 25:23, James 1:22-23)
I turned down becoming a pilot from my dad so unless heaven is like the Matrix I won't be flying Enterprise. However, I've asked for the alien tour position and I'll be in great company of men from Great Britain, Japan and the USA ages 37-65 who warped their brains watching 26+ times episodes of Star Wars. (Grant one of my sons to sit on your right hand and the other on the left hand..Matthew 20:20-23). I've got my request into God for the alien tour position.
Man was not made to carry the weight of the world on his shoulders. I liked helping my husband work off stress and also exercise is a stress reliever. #1 Stress/pain reliever is not Tylenol, it's taking your problems every day to the foot of the cross in faith (Matthew 11:28-30 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”)
Man is not our problem. (Ephesians 6:12). I had a dream when I first was married that our house was surrounded by evil men with machine guns. I believe that was a vision of the spirit world. They could not get in to our house. The exes, the boss, other people who criticize and gossip are not our problem. How do we overcome people? We say "God bless them and pray for them." It did wonders for me in forgiving a former boss (Matthew 5:44, Luke 6:28, James 3:9)
In Star Wars, Hans Solo calls Princess Leia, "Your worship." I don't worship the ground a person walks on. A man must present a challenge like a Rubik's Cube. In 1Peter 3:6 Sarah called Abraham Lord/Master. If my husband's heart was 100% with God it worked, but when I followed him sinning, I got rebuked by others like Abimelech rebuked Sarah and Abraham for lying (Genesis 20:9). When I followed my heart against my husband's sinning, I was commended by others like David commended Abigail (1 Sam 25:32).
Cougars? Panthers? Tigers? Leopards? Lioness? They don’t care what age their prey is. They don’t fear danger. Love is bold and it will take risks. (The wicked man flees though no one pursues, but the righteous are as bold as a lion. Proverbs 8:21). I’ve already gone through several of my nine lives. I don’t stalk my prey, but a man may need encouragement as far as sharing your physical or spiritual food with him. (Ezekiel 19:2, Psalm 104:21, 34:10, Job 38:39)
A sign that you are dating the right person is when they are interested in your dreams. They will read your favorite book. I attended many secular concerts and parties in my married life to please my husband. My mother-in-law learned to golf so she could spend more time with her husband. My spouse supported my vision to start a bowling club at work and watched my children to help me get a college degree. Jesus had the regular 12 in his boat crew (John 6:67-68).
What do you want out of dating? I dated men who I decided to keep as friends and companions to events. It's nice to feel safe and secure when I go out. Not "I’m going to be used.” (The blessing of the Lord brings wealth, and he "adds no trouble to it." Proverbs 10:22). Had enough of Mr. Troubled in my life! Be careful of firework relationships, they fizzle out over time. Love never fails as you survive the coping stage of their faults. (1 Cor. 13:8, 1 Peter 4:8)
Marriage is a difficult mountain to climb. I prefer a man who is a race horse over a mule, but it seems we all have our stubborn moments at time. My husband respected that I had been a Christian a long time and he would listen to my counsel (was teachable). He always told me, "Don’t say I had a bad feeling about that warn me in advance." I respected his authority and his intelligence (Proverbs 15:22, 11:14, 20:18, 1Timothy 3:2, 2Tim 2:4, James 3:13)
People may date around because they don’t know what they want. (He is a double-minded man, unstable in all he undertakes. James 1:8) Divorced people look for a better relationship. Widows want to replace the person with similar qualities. When I had dinner with an engineer from Purdue, I concluded I could not have another serious guy. Although my husband was easy going and I could tease him, the lack of comedy bothered me. Women usually want a man with a sense of humor.
People tend to project their insecurities on their spouse. My dad felt insecure about not going to college so he was critical of my 1 B on a report card of all A's. Then in marriage, if a man was failing at his job, he took it out on me. If a man is always trying to change me and does not accept me the way I am, it's conditional love. God does not say, “go clean up your act and then I will accept you.” "Just as I am and I’m accepted in the beloved (Ephesians 1:6).
Men warm up to romance, affection and touch. I sang and played romantic songs with my guitar when I was divorced and guys loved it. I was the one that initiated romance and affection in my marriage. My husband was tone-deaf but he sang love songs to me. I have a song since I've met sweet guys recently. ”Sugar…Oh honey…honey…you are my candy (guy)….and you got me wanting you….pour a little sugar on me honey…pour your sweetness over me”….(Song of Solomon 4:11)
I have a friend who as an advanced skier, went to the bunny slopes to ski with his wife. I was driving by the golf range and I saw my father-in-law beating his golf iron on the ground. My husband beat himself down when he bowled badly. I enjoyed doing many things with him, but not sports because of his attitude about losing. Tony Dungy says it’s more about character and how you play the game than winning the game. (1 Cor. 15:33, Romans 5:4, Prov. 31:10)
Did not get the job? Keep looking. In programming if the code did not work, change the variables. Change variables in life. Einstein said insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. The Dead Sea has everything going into it and not going out. Get yourself out of the house or you may date the Sears repair man. Thomas Edison and Henry Ford made failures the road to success. We are more than conquerors through him who loved us. (Romans 8:37).
Holidays are tough in missing cookouts with my parents and my husband. I like a good comedy song or movie. Along, with pulling out my guitar and singing "How great is our God, he rolled back the waters of the Red Sea and He said I'm going to lead you, put your trust in me." David encouraged himself in the Lord and his band of misfits. Glad to know God cares about misfits like me. (Psalm 142, 34, 40, 42)
I like an aggressive guy. Joshua/Caleb type…let’s go take the land. Not a jellyfish. Although, my husband was aggressive since he was on steroids for asthma. Shy guys, you have to be a little bolder and I will ask a stranger to dance. I was shy when I was younger, but that was the fear of man (the fear of man brings a snare) Naomi told Ruth to go lay at Boaz’s feet which was a proposal (Ruth 3:1-18). I will throw a guy some bait (throw a dog a bone) and see if takes it.
I pile clothes up on the opposite side of my bed because of the empty space where I miss my husband and 14 years of intimacy. Many men I meet they are intimacy avoiders. They have been hurt by a mean parent or an ex so they won’t bond or give their heart (the two become one) to a woman out of fear. (1 John 18: There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear has torment. He that fears is not made perfect in love.)
The turtle still beat the over confident rabbit. God is not in a hurry. Jesus waited to rise up Lazarus. Through faith and patience we inherit the promises. (Hebrews 6:12) Those who wait (minister to) on the Lord will run and not be weary (Isaiah 40:31). I'm Danica Patrick on the interstate so I set my car to cruise control to keep my speed down. Broke my ankle running down the stairs last year, the first broken bone ever, now I walk down stairs.
Solomon was the wisest man on the planet in his days and he had 1000 wives and concubines (not so wise). But God was pleased that He asked for wisdom (1Kings 3:9-14) so God gave him everything else too and God tells us to ask for wisdom. (James 1:5-6) Do you think that God can give us wisdom on how we catch just one special person for us? He did for me in overcoming the fear of meeting a stalker and I found my husband through a single's ad. History repeats itself.
My sanctuary is the back deck enjoying birds and trees and my front porch looking at sunsets. It's boating and being out in God’s nature and enjoying friendship and fun. My husband and I talked about taking walks in the neighborhood, but we never got around to it. I won’t make that mistake again. (Praise the LORD. Praise God in his sanctuary; praise him in his mighty heavens…Psalm 150:1; till I entered the sanctuary of God; then I understood their final destiny. Psalm 73:17)
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